Curiosity.
“A creatively lived life is any life where consistently, routinely, habitually and constantly you choose the path of curiosity over the path fear” — Elizabeth Gilbert
The brilliant writer goes on to say, “Not once. Not twice. Not a few times. But all the times. All the time. Because you’re constantly going to be in these crossroads in your life, daily almost, where there’s a lure of curiosity on this side and there’s kind of roadblock of fear over here saying ‘Take this safer path. I don’t know how that one ends so let’s just continue with this.’ And if you keep going to the right on the fear path instead of going to the left on the curiosity path your life gets smaller and heavier.”
Amen, Elizabeth Gilbert, amen.
Scientists discovered that we’re most curious when we know a little about a subject (our curiosity has been piqued) but not too much (we’re still uncertain about the answer). This aligns with George Loewenstein’s Information Gap Theory of Curiosity: “Curiosity is rather simple. It comes when we feel a gap ‘between what we know and what we want to know’. This gap has emotional consequences: it feels like a mental itch. We seek out new knowledge because that’s how we scratch the itch.
While creatives often speak to the importance of curiosity to cultivate their work, they don’t have a monopoly on the emotion. So, go ahead. Scratch the itch. We are all better off curious.
IN FASHION
While there are zero concrete stats on the number of women who have experienced a style rut as they age, the increasing number of fashion substacks, booming chats and communities built around this topic, and growing legions of stylists indicate it’s been virtually everyone at some point.
But curiosity keeps our minds — and our wardrobes — fresh. Especially in a time when, as HURS Media eloquently noted, “It's hard to ignore the sameness that has crept into every corner of the fashion industry. Everywhere you look, the same trends, the same brands, and the same looks dominate. From the endless stream of identical products to the monotonous feed of luxury "starter packs" on social media, it feels like we’ve lost the very essence that made fashion so compelling. Individualism is fading, replaced by a pervasive culture of safety and conformity that has designers playing it safe and consumers dressing for approval rather than authenticity.”
Whether we lean into uniform dressing (Allison Bornstein has been known to say, “Consistency does not have to mean repetition”) or gravitate to every trend, staying open-minded is vital. To style, yes, but more importantly to happiness. Dopamine dressing (dressing in a way that brings you joy, often tied to colors) and Enclothed Cognition (what we wear can influence our thoughts, feelings, and behaviors) are not new principles, but reinforce that our curiosity — through exploring new ideas in what we wear — can substantially impact our lives. Want to learn more? Stylist Laura Sawyier just did a TEDx on this very topic.
While committed to my minimalist uniform, I recently ventured outside the lines through an inventive new shopping platform called CAKE. With this invite-only membership, you get access to brands you love (Veronica Beard, YSE Beauty, Jenni Kayne, Freda Salvador)— and many you have yet to discover (Another Tomorrow, CO, Phillip Lim, Cara Cara). I was curious about the deals, of course, but also the breakthrough concept; this is my first (and only) brand relationship.
It’s like Einstein said, “The mind that opens to a new idea never returns to its original size.”
The $100/year membership unlocks thousands to spend + VIP access and experiences. To date, I have used my membership to expand my wardrobe’s color palette; I own my first leopard item thanks to this fabulous pair of Larroude shoes. I am finally channeling Jenna Lyons, who brilliantly declared more than a decade ago that “leopard is a neutral.”
Curious about joining?
Get your exclusive invite here.
IN BEAUTY
While taking the road less traveled can mean mixing up your looks and finding new ways to express yourself through beauty, beauty curiosity goes deeper than identifying the next best lip pencil.
Nature is an overlooked beauty element in our daily lives, largely thanks to our tech-driven existence — which has, coincidentally, been instrumental in killing curiosity. But if autumn is anything, other than the best season for cashmere and cider, it’s the perfect opportunity to step out and remember the wonder and inspiration of the outdoors. The stunning changing hues make for perfect nail shades sure, but as my dear friend, beauty entrepreneur, biophilic lifestylist and outdoor enthusiast Jennifer Walsh says, “Beauty is not a luxury; it is a necessity for the human spirit, mind, and society. By recognizing and embracing its full potential, we can create a world where beauty heals, connects, and transforms.”
And Walsh reminds me often that these aesthetic experiences are directly linked to our wellbeing — and longevity. Calming effects, boosted immune systems, reduced risk of chronic disease and more. Studies concur that nature can reduce our brain’s mental fatigue, improving the attention and focus we need for creative ideation.
Neuroscience has also taught us: “Beauty is a particularly potent and intense form of curiosity. It’s a learning signal urging us to keep paying attention, an emotional reminder that there’s something here worth figuring out. If we’re looking at a Rothko, that twinge of beauty is telling us that this painting isn’t just a blob of color; if we’re listening to a Beethoven symphony, the feeling of beauty keeps us fixated on the notes, trying to find the underlying pattern; if we’re reading a poem, a particularly beautiful line slows down our reading, so that we might pause and figure out what the line actually means. Beauty is a motivational force that helps modulate conscious awareness. The problem beauty solves is trying to figure out which sensations are worth making sense of and which ones can be easily ignored.”
Tapping into natural beauty to make the world make sense and determining what means the most to us? This sounds a lot like exploring grey areas. Now we’re talking my love language. And it all starts with curiosity.
WITH AGE
Curiosity naturally declines with age. A 2020 study showed that 20% of adults could not remember the last time their curiosity was sparked.
Much like a positive mindset, curiosity can keep us young. When we are curious, we are motivated to learn and grow, and this preserved curiosity protects against cognitive and physical decline. It activates the brain’s reward centers, which are regulated by dopamine; the more dopamine, the less cognitive decline.
A 2015 study suggested that curiosity is linked to fruit and vegetable consumption — the more we eat, the more curious we will be. The researchers noted, however, the effects were not cumulative; increased curiosity didn’t carry over onto days of eating less fruit and vegetables. More recent studies continue to connect our diet to protecting cognitive decline.
While puzzles have been notoriously connected to cognitive health as we age, being open — which is a prerequisite to being curious — to anything new is the best place to start. Forbes said it best: “Curiosity opens us up to surprise and possibility. Curiosity is the playground of discovery. Fear locks us into indecision. It hampers our desire to try. When we let fear control us, we imagine the myriad things that could go wrong in our attempts.”
At 82, Martha Stewart attributes curiosity to her continued drive. Having read years of Martha Stewart Living magazine in my youth, I will be watching when Netflix releases her namesake documentary, MARTHA, on October 30th. I am curious how her story unfurls on film, how about you?
Stay curious. xx
Always a joy to read your articles and learn something new. Curiousity is an enabler to health beauty aging and clothing styles for oneself …you put things very eloquently and I’m always learning from you sharing via your brilliant writing xoxo
Gorgeous! Can’t wait to see them on the mean streets. Xo